The reason you 'keep doing the work' in relationship
I had the date of my dreams last night🧚♀️ Let me preface this with, it’s been crazy times here. 2 years of lockdown, homeschool x 3 + a very active pre-schooler + work (cue, no break!), I worked a crazy 4 months straight, so I could have December off, where I organised a killer 50th 4-day fiesta, backed it up with a 4yo birthday party, then an 8yo birthday party, then Christmas, then a puppy, & here we are, still up 1-2 times a night + back to cleaning 💩 + wee 🤦♀️ It’s gotten disconnected. We were back in cycles of clean up, TV, bed. Resentment + tension rising. “𝘐’𝘮 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘵𝘰𝘯𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵. 𝘉𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘺 𝘣𝘺 𝟻𝘱𝘮.” He said. When disconnection goes on too long there’s an awkwardness in contemplating connection, isn’t there? My mind raced, my body recoiled. How could I be with all the built up tension, all the presumed ‘unseen’ pain AND be out on a date?? So I went to counter all the reasons I couldn’t. Like a pro, he navigated my resistance. “𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘦𝘦𝘯𝘴 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘣𝘢𝘣𝘺𝘴𝘪𝘵𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘐’𝘷𝘦 𝘰𝘳𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘥 𝘜𝘣𝘦𝘳, 𝘐’𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘰𝘭𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘸𝘢𝘪𝘵 𝘶𝘱. 𝘞𝘦𝘢𝘳 𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘨𝘰𝘰𝘥 𝘪𝘯. 𝘞𝘦’𝘳𝘦 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘵 𝟻. 𝘕𝘰𝘸 𝘨𝘰 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘬, 𝘐’𝘭𝘭 𝘴𝘦𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘯.” I smiled. That was enough to cut through my BS. I got ready. I was nervous. All my control-freakiness seeped to the surface. “𝘑𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘵𝘦𝘭𝘭 𝘮𝘦 𝘴𝘰 𝘐’𝘭𝘭 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘸𝘦𝘢𝘳!” I begged him. But he wouldn’t let on. We got in the car, I was literally jiggling with nervous anticipation. He parked. We were at strip shops. “𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘸𝘢𝘺” he lead. My heart sunk a little as I saw all the restaurants & thought how much I didn’t want to sit & make small talk. He lead me through glass doors. Up an elevator. He opened a door & lead me inside…
A softly lit room revealed a table laid out with champagne & antipasto. A bed with flowers. “𝘐𝘵’𝘴 𝘣𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘢 𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘮𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘩𝘴” he said. “𝘞𝘦 𝘬𝘦𝘦𝘱 𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘩 𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 & 𝙄 𝙩𝙝𝙤𝙪𝙜𝙝𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙗𝙚𝙨𝙩 𝙜𝙞𝙛𝙩 𝙄 𝙘𝙤𝙪𝙡𝙙 𝙜𝙞𝙫𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙬𝙖𝙨 𝙨𝙞𝙡𝙚𝙣𝙘𝙚. 𝘈 𝘳𝘰𝘰𝘮 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘭𝘢𝘺 𝘪𝘯 & 𝘦𝘯𝘫𝘰𝘺 𝘴𝘪𝘭𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦.” Well I burst into tears 😭 Finally, my heart flowed again. It’s always surprising to me how thick those walls can get, yet how quickly they can melt. We couldn’t stay overnight, we don’t have overnight sitters. But we could stay as long as I wanted. I held him for the longest time, as my heart told the stories my voice no longer needed to. We lay in silence, sipping 🥂 where the only sound was 🍾bubbles. A butterfly suddenly appeared in our room. We let the butterfly out & a whole lot of fun in 🤫 It was my perfect date 👉no etiquette or people, but loads of silence + debauchery #nailedit#nailedit There was a time he could never have done this. There was a time I’d never have let him. You can change anything you want, with just enough heart + just enough courage ♥️
You can do relationship ‘training’ with me in QUEEN SCHOOL.