Female arousal is completely different to what we're taught
- Julie Tenner
- Aug 30, 2023
- 1 min read
When I ask couples ‘what is sex?’
What I invariably hear is, it’s 🍆in🍑.
When I ask men in my workshops ‘𝘥𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘩𝘰𝘭𝘥 𝘢 𝘧𝘦𝘢𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘵𝘰𝘰 𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘨?’, 100% of men answer ‘𝗻𝗼’.
When I ask women this question, 100% say ‘𝘆𝗲𝘀’.
When I ask men in my workshops ‘𝘥𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘦𝘹𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘹𝘪𝘦𝘵𝘺 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶’𝘳𝘦 ‘𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘦𝘪𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘨’ 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘳𝘶𝘯 𝘢 𝘧𝘦𝘢𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦𝘯’𝘵 ‘𝘨𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘯𝘦𝘯𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩’?’ 73% of men answer, ‘𝗻𝗼’.
86% of women answer ‘𝘆𝗲𝘀’.
In the couples I work with, sex is usually over once the 🍆 has ejaculated.
Both men and women perform for the 🍆 to get it up, keep it hard and feel desirable.
Foreplay is considered the thing you do to get to ‘the main show’.
Both men and women run beliefs around:
❌ touching the 🍑 early on = arousal
❌ going straight for the nipples = arousal
❌💦wet without much time or effort
❌ that it’s a hard 🍆 that makes her 💦
𝗜𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗲𝗻𝗱 𝘀ex 𝗯𝗲𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗲𝘀 𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗶𝗿𝗲𝗹𝘆 🍆 𝗳𝗼𝗰𝘂𝘀𝗲𝗱 - 𝗶𝘀 𝗱𝗶𝗰𝘁𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝗯𝘆 𝘁𝗵𝗲🍆, 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝘁𝗵𝗲🍆 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗶𝘀 𝗼𝘃𝗲𝗿 𝗼𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗲🍆 𝗶𝘀 𝘀𝗼𝗳𝘁 𝗼𝗿 𝗵𝗮𝘀 𝗲𝗷𝗮𝗰𝘂𝗹𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗱.
It’s not your fault. It’s not anyones ‘fault’. But it is important to recognise the system you’re a product of and begin discussing with your partner if there’s anything you want to change.
Because FEMALE arousal looks completely different.
Want to learn more and be guided by someone else as you do? 𝗖𝗢𝗨𝗣𝗟𝗘𝗦𝗢𝗡𝗟𝗜𝗡𝗘𝗪𝗢𝗥𝗞𝗦𝗛𝗢𝗣𝗘𝗫𝗣𝗘𝗥𝗜𝗘𝗡𝗖𝗘is where it’s at.
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